so i started my morning crying after having a dream about my lolo. I use to just dream of my lola who passed away before, but i was still young and i was closer to my lolo. My dream about my lolo was so real. he was there, my lola was there, my parents, titas, titos and cousins were there too, it was like how things normally were. the last time i dreamt of him was the night before we got the phone call from the philippines. my family said it was his way of saying goodbye to me, after that i just did not sleep for how many nights. i just wish i had more time with him. i wish i could have been by his side in the hospital, as sad as it still would have been to see him so sick. i've tried to get rid of those feelings and all those sad memories during that time, but that dream just made me relive it all again. I told my parents like usual, i mean its nothing unusual anymore. I had a dream about my lola and i'm thinking my other lolo (i've never met him) when i was in the philippines, and it was like they were telling me to visit them in the cemetary, so that next day i went with my daddy, uncle and brother. After this recent dream, i went to church with my mommy and darryl. Having those dreams are so bitter sweet to me. I like that i still feel connected to them even though i can't really be with them, but then that's why its so sad. My dreams about them won't come true, they're not with me anymore. So all i can do is pray. and when i pray, i feel better after realizing that my lolos and my lola aren't suffering anymore. It's still hard talking about them so yeah...

Anyways, thank goodness i had a field trip today. I so would not have been able to focus in school. I was texting clarisse, phia, nicole and ernest throughout the trip :) I wish they went to the zoo with me too, that would have been even more fun! but anyways so I convinced Zarrah to research the arctic wolf like me cus i didn't want to go by myself ahaha. It was so traffic we only had 2 hours at the zoo, so me and zarrah were running and it was raining all day. But it just drizzling; so it was kinda nice walking in the rain lol. and even though we were researching the wolves, we took lots of pics of the polar bears and the snow leopard =p omgsh..the baby snow leopards-kota & tiga are soo cute! i really want them, i've told so many ppl that but *imitates little girl* ..whatevaa! ahaha oh yeah i remember on the bus ride i was playing "cooking mama" on zarrah's itouch-love that game lol. and there was one stage where you had to flip something, and i was panicking asking how to do it, but there wasn't enough time to ask..and i ended up actually tossing zarrah's itouch in the air! omgshhh my heart stopped! ...thank goodness i caught it. lmfaoo we were dying after that, and i was close to dying if i didn't catch it ahah. When we came back to school, me, zarrah, ate gail, grace, gaby and jason took pictures by the stairwell. not such a good idea, cus all these random ppl kept walking through =p

After school, me and clarisse went to nicole's (: something funny always happens with us. today's funny story was when we were passing a driveway, there was a van and on the van was a loose cat. and nicole was walking close to it, when i noticed the cat i immediately just blurted out "What is THAT?!" really loudly, and Nicole screamed sooo loud and ran to the main street! ahahah Her and clarisse were both really scared. I didn't mean to scare them, lmaooooo but their reactions were sooo hilarious! ahahahah just thinking about it makes me laugh. They had to literally stop for a minute to resume breathing again. lol at nicole's we wanted to watch glee, but her tv was malfunctioning lol of course we ate (that's always a given ahah) and we also talked about our debuts! tehe i asked my parents to finally make up their minds, and they said they'll give me one (: I hope they know how important that is to me. i've never had a big bday, and a debut is like every little filipino girls dream other than their wedding =p I don't want to get too excited, actually no its too late, i can't help myself ahah. I just hope it all works out *crosses fingers*

ciao.